Why power and boundaries come from within, and how to wield them both wisely

I’m a firm believer in the concept of being your whole self, at work or wherever you are.  Why should you be anything other than who you are. 

However, that doesn’t mean giving all of yourself to your work. 

There have to be boundaries, there have to be times when you are not available, where you don’t care more about something or someone in the work context than you do about your home or personal life. 

By the way, I’ll admit I’m still practicing doing the former without also doing the latter.

Some boundaries are imposed upon us, and others are ours to design and enforce.  Diane White and I talked about the nature of relationships in the workplace, and the concept of boundaries between work colleagues and friends. 

Does it help to have a friendly person to talk to at work, definitely.  Do you have to have a best friend at work to feel fulfilled, no.  You can still feel loyalty, still work hard, still share a common purpose.

Linked to this is the concept of power.  Power in organisations is often described in hierarchical terms – the lines on the boxes that supposedly describe the structure of the organisation, but in reality they only show the formal reporting lines between positions and people. 

Power in organisations can be formally designed, mandated, wielded.  Delegations, board or executive team membership, day-to-day decision-making about who does what and when. 

But power is a more nuanced concept.  Power exists in all of us.  We need to take accountability for the power each of us have and ensure we’re using it for good, for the right reasons, maximising its impact through collaboration, sensible decision-making, kindness.

And just as we all have power to do, we also have power not to do.  We can withhold power, just as we can not make a decision.

There are always swings and roundabouts, lines that aren’t really straight but wiggle around and are often not lines at all but vague markings that you’re aware of but you can ignore.  Like a shadow on the ground, its not going to trip you up, but you see it.

Giving up the power you have to craft and defend your boundaries, and exercising your power act when you could withhold (to work after hours or on weekends, when you’re sick, when your kid asks you to watch their performance)…that’s where we all need to learn what it means to not give you whole self to your work.

Pastries, seeking purpose and the power of boundaries, with Diane White - podcast

The illustration below depicts the journey of the podcast episode with Diane, have a read. 

Hear my whole conversation with Diane White.

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